The Duke Chronicles

Day 402 of my captivity. The humans that are holding me hostage have once again shoved me into this plastic container. Chances are they are taking me to the larger cat prison where I think they do scientific testing and torture. I must find a chance to escape. To throw off the humans I will moan and cry to pretend that I am not happy at the current situation. I am possibly entertaining the thought of peeing in the container. Maybe the humans will let me out and I can make my escape? Drats... peeing tactic was unsuccessful. Humans pulled over to try to clean me up, but had no towel - whatever that is - they are now yelling at me that I made my bed and now have to lie in it. Upon arrival to the larger prison I was subjected to some sort of torture called a "dry shower". Apparently it was to help clean up my pee debacle. AHHH SUCCESS! I have ruined the large pink thing on my leg and it will need to come off... what??? wait.... they will be putting me down to do this! DRATS! My plan of having an evil demeanor in order for all humans to leave me alone has failed. Will be unable to escape due to being in....ca... pasated......zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz............

Day 403 of my captivity: Wa.... what happened.... last thing I remember was the humans placing me in a large torture container. WAIT! WHAT IS THIS!!!! There is now a large purple thing on my leg. Apparently my plan to sabotage the large pink thing worked, but the humans seem to be able to easily replace it. Drats.... Must work on my new plan of escape while I am laid up with this thing on my leg. Heard something the other day about allergies... must learn what they are and how to use them to my advantage.